bunny tales

It has been close to 2 months since I last blogged. The roller coaster of my life continues to run. I have been climbing up trials of daily living and work, reached a peak or two in the year-end and festive season events, and have moments of disappointment where I see myself tearing down the tracks of emotional distress bringing me to the deep pits of life. Occasionally there are a few loops of joy and the occasion sudden breaks for me to catch a breather. There are so many things I wish to talk about, but with my defensive shield up, I took the stand where silence is golden– better to say nothing than to talk– in fear of opening the floodgates of scrutiny and interrogation from people who are… let’s say, they just don’t understand me.

A new year. 2007. Can you believe it? With a blink of an eye, I have been in Malaysia for over 4 months now. I miss every experience in Japan dearly. I even find myself walking through my daily life in Japan, the things I do, the places I go, and the people I meet every time I close my eyes. It has been a while now and I find it difficult to imagine the voices of the ones I love though I can still remember the conversations that we had.

The effects of reverse culture shock. Am I over reacting? Am I not even trying to adapt to life here? I really don’t know. I feel like a caged bird.

I have to admit, I am in the state of fear and really scared at the beginning of this year. Please accept my apologies if I have not been keep in contact with my loves out there. You are on my mind and in my heart. Now, I have to deal with the shadows and devils within me before I can move on. Your prayers and support is much appreciated.

Though wilting, I will hang in there, being the Suemae who you know best. I will survive and not let those who love me best down.